Once again i’m feeling down. It always been this I hate life type of thing for me. I don’t know why I started hating life. and I don’t know why I let myself hate life. One thing I should have never gone for, resulted in a cascade of bad things piled up one on top of another. Looking back there would be so many things that I would change. The choices I made were such shit, i don’t know why i even started it. There have been so opportunities given to me that could have made things so much better now, but I think I’ve just about hit rock bottom. I should just talk to her, but I never really have a chance either that or i just don’t have the balls to talk to her (probably the latter) I pretty much fucked up with my mommy and daddy. I guess the only thing I can do is just hope for some A’s, focus on water polo, and not be retarded. I really wish I could just forget and forget and forget and move on. Recently I thought it was over, but today was a shit day, so… idk, hopefully sumtin gets better
I really wish, i could just get over it. I wish i could fix my personality and I really wish i knew what i did wrong. I wish I could move on and never look back so I could be happy again. I wish I knew what depression felt like so I could actually tell myself for sure that I’m not depressed. There are so many things I wish that could happen, but i know that life will not allow it. Maybe if I persevere life will turn out good. But this is such a different scenario and I really wish I didn’t make so many mistakes back then. I hate how my life is being centered on her. Now the only thing i look forward to doing is running, and running, running away the pain, tiring my self out til i will no longer be able to think. Spending time with other friends and just exercising so that both physically and mentally i will be too tired to think about her.
I really wish, I could ignore her.
Haha, it seems kinda cool, but my mommy thinks its a waste of time :(
i did pretty bad xD
everyone elxe was really sore from practice, test set the day before WOOOO :P
I came to do what I needed to do, and now it’s time to peace outta here.
Bye, little penguin! I’ll be back someday!
MAMA PENGUIN TO THE RESCUE! ANSWERIN’ THE MESSAGE I SENT, LIKE A BAUS